Finally: The Angry Birds Bra.

Thanks to Etsy seller SceeneShoes the more tech/nerd minded laides can finally sport their most favorite game on their…chest with the unofficial Angry Birds bra. Available for $35 in sizes ranging from 34A to 38DD, the hand-painted apparel will definitely turn heads when displaying not only the birds, but the contents of the birds as well. (It’s a win win for spectators!)

As of writing the red bird and green pig are as good as it gets. Hopefully as this sure-to-gain-popularity-piece-of-clothing rises in web presence we’ll see some more birds join the party.

**If Angry Birds on your boobs isn’t the most thrilling thought, SceeneShoes has some other hand-painted private attire such as Pokeball boobs and Nintendo Controller boobs. Looks like we’ve got the next years worth of the wife’s gifts set and accounted for…

Apple puppet Phil Schiller on the App Store booby ban: Boobs are only ok from “household” names. Double standards ooze out of every pore…

Like heaping piles of BS early in the morning to get your morning off to the perfect cynical start? Well aren’t you a lukcy human, you’ve come to the right place. As you all may know, Apple recently went an a great purging of any titillating and “sexy” apps from the app store. Thousands of apps showing boobs, butts, and stomachs were removed from the App Store because apparently, “women and children were bitching in mass numbers”. The real factoid that pushes this from stupid to utter BS however is that apps such as Sports Illustrated (the only version that matters) and Playboy just to name a couple, are still alive and well. Their reasoning, according to Schiller:

The difference is this is a well-known company with previously published material available broadly in a well-accepted format

Essentially, the booby ban only applies to those small developers and companies who aren’t already big household names — again, large names such as Sports Illustrated and Playboy.

Um, how are small companies and devs supposed to get big if the platform they’re trying to get big on bans them for utter BS? Ya, ya, ya, I know what some are saying: Don’t like it, don’t support. Well, I don’t as I got rid of my iPhone many months ago. But this is so much bigger than some stupid boobs bouncing on screen and some cheap thrills. Every single iPhone user that doesn’t voice disgust essentially is showing Apple that we as a consumer base (at least here in the US) rollover and take it whenever our freedoms get trounced on.

Ok, so they banned boobs in the name of women and children. Seems harmless, but what happens when they ban all calendar apps because they have some new 3/4 baked solution of their own. Or what happens when they put the kibosh on all voice controlled apps because someone called in a bomb threat with a voice note they recorded on their iPhone? Don’t laugh. Apple uses that same reasoning all the time. Just look at the whole “Fuck”/twitter timeline fiasco that happened early last year.

Before this get’s any longer, we’ll end saying that Apple is only hurting themselves. This is nothing more than a knee-jerk reaction to appease only a certain part of their large marketshare. While on the surface it may seem noble and clean, the precedent it sets is anything but. In the end, this whole saving of little johnny’s innocence could be largely helped if mom and dad did their jobs as parents, and further tweaking parental controls — not blatantly removing entire sections of the App Store.

Let yourselves be heard!

TechCrunch

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WTF?! Apple orders all apps > “G” expunged. Continues to push iPhone platform further into irrelevance.

Since way back in 2007, Apple has been pretty strict about sexual content in the App Store. At first there was just cause — there wasn’t really any easy or robust measures set in place to protect the kiddies from the horrors of nipples and wieners. Then came OS 3.0 and better parental controls. It even got to the point that Apple was starting to switch sides by approving iBoob and iBabe app to the joy of many iPhoners alike. But just as fast as it all started, it’s ending — a burning, crashing ending.

Call it the great “Sexual Smiting of 2010″ if you want, the simple fact is that Apple is going ape shit removing any and all apps that aren’t “G” rated. So far, it’s been reported that over 5,000 apps (and counting) have seen the ban hammer boomerang back around and catch them off guard. One such developer is the man behind the formerly available “iBoobs”. This is what “Jonau” had to say:

1. No images of women in bikinis (Ice skating tights are not OK either)
2. No images of men in bikinis! (I didn’t ask about Ice Skating tights for men)
3. No skin (he seriously said this) (I asked if a Burqa was OK, and the Apple guy got angry)
4. No silhouettes that indicate that Wobble can be used for wobbling boobs (yes – I am serious, we have to remove the silhouette in this pic) — [See pic on right]
5. No sexual connotations or innuendo: boobs, babes, booty, sex – all banned
6. Nothing that can be sexually arousing!! (I doubt many people could get aroused with the pic above but those puritanical guys at Apple must get off on pretty mundane things to find Wobble “overtly sexual!)
7. No apps will be approved that in any way imply sexual content (not sure how Playboy is still in the store, but …)

I lost that iPhone fanboy/lust/glassy eyed, blind love a long time ago. Once Apple started getting more and more asinine and outspoken on jailbreaking and at the same time, severely limiting innovation in the App Store, I called it quits and moved on to bigger and better things. Hell, even after seeing a small sliver of Windows Phone 7 from MWC, I’d even go as far to say that Microsoft (of all people) could regain valuable market share from Apple if they continue fucking people over like this.

Regardless if you use your iPhone for PG+ material or not, how can you not feel even a little bit disgusted about Apple’s stance and polices regarding the removal of anything even remotely 2x removed to a boob? It’s a stupid knee-jerk reaction is what it is. So a kid saw a boob. Big damn deal. Better that than a head getting sliced off, wouldn’t you say?

In the end, Apple isn’t protecting anyone. They’re only hurting themselves and the iPhone platform. Why the hell would I want to support an environment that has some morons sitting on chairs with reject buttons who can’t even display common sense for 10% of the apps that come through the approval line?

Yet another reason to drop the utter bullshit of a platform that Apple hath created…

MobileCrunch > ChilliFresh

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